I saw the movie Les Miserables for the second time today with family. This time I wasn’t so in shock and awe of the fantastic singing, music, costumes, set, etc. This time I really took in the message. There are some people in the world who are suffering so greatly, yet are responsible for so much (a family) that they don’t have the time to even contemplate committing suicide let alone wonder about their philosophical purpose. I am very lucky to have been able to stop working/learning and spend a great deal of time trying to treat and understand my depression. There are too many in the world that bear great sickness yet are not as lucky as me. There are too many people who suffer from diseases that we, in the first world, easily treat and/or prevent. It is not fair for me to dream of a genetically perfect world if it will not be possible for each and every individual. I am extremely grateful to my parents who made it possible for me to study at Berkeley for a semester and a half-ish, but would it really have been fair to spend any more time there, paying out of state tuition when there are so many who do not have access to a basic education let alone able to afford the cost of college. I am grateful for meeting Dr. Urnov and all that he has done and continues to do for me – I would not have met him if I never attended Berkeley.
For years I have dreamed of becoming filthy rich so that I could give the vast majority of my wealth to those in need. There are a couple of splurges I wanted to make for myself with the money (see, not my money): an ornate library in my house and a flashy sports car for my dad. I know both are ridiculous and unnecessary, but that is how I want to be greedy. From this day on I want to devote my life to those who suffer and have far less hope and support than me.